Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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