no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize