We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
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