Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
