so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
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