is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize