angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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