the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
