the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
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