Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
Randomize
