Where are you?
In a non slutty way
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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