Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
Randomize
