i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
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i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
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He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Randomize