Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Randomize