I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
