I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
