He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
