he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
NoShamevember. You game?
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Randomize
