theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
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