At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize