I'm so fucking centered right now
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
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