He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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