You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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