she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Randomize
