We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
