You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
My feet surprised me
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize