my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Someone shattered a urinal.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
