once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
Randomize