Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
