Bisexual people are plain selfish.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
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