I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize