Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
