Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
