we have pet lesbian snakes
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
