Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
