Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Randomize
