Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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