got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
