She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
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