she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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