So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
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