Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
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