I have demons in me.
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
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