is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
