tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
