I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
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