Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
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HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
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