Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
