every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
