he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Church boner. Awkwardddd
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Randomize